A Pickle in the Pool

Last week I decided to take Emily to the 'new and improved' Lynnwood Recreation Center's pool for the first time. The girl is a fish in the water lately - going under water all the time now and swimming forward in shallow water, so we're trying to get to the pool as much as possible.

I hear this pool has some sort of bad ass water spray type thingy. They also have two water slides, which Emily can't go on until next year. Sigh. (What is it with height requirements on water slides and ferris wheels, damn it?!?)

We arrived at the local pool palace, and it was indeed nice. We got on our splashing duds and waded into the very shallow beach swim area. There we were - just us 2 - for a good 20 minutes. It was really quite calm and peaceful. They had a play structure right in the middle.

The water spray function wasn't turned on for the morning yet, so we continued to play and wait. More people start showing up and, about 10 minutes later, I wondered when this water was going to flow.

I decided to ask a lifeguard: 'Excuse me. Do you know when they will be turning on the water?'

She said in a somewhat excited tone, 'Oh! Do you want the water on? I can turn it on if you want it!'

I looked around and looked back at her and said, 'Well, yeah! That'd be great! I didn't know you had to request it be turned on.'

I look around at all the other moms/kids in the pool again. They looked away, refused to make eye contact with me. I got the sense not everyone was keen on this water thing for whatever reason, but that was the whole reason for our visit. I asked a few of them if it'd be okay. And they hesitantly, almost forcefully, said 'Yes.'
Hmmmmm. I was in a pickle.

5 minutes later, a "WHOOOSH!" sound happened along with some loud rumbling...
the water hath arrived.

Holy Mother of Aqua! Water was freaking everywhere. You'd think we were on the sinking Titanic. It was LOUD and plentiful. This wasn't your rainbow and lollipop spray park. The spray guns were more like fire hoses. The waterfalls on the play toy could have waterboarded any kid if they looked upright. The spray function they have is less than relaxing and extremely chaotic.

Emily LOVED it. However, in the corner of my eye I saw the moms and kids who were in the pool with us slowly start to make their way to the very far corner where no water was gushing. And there they stood, very annoyed, just watching the waterpalooza go. After that, about 4 kids started to cry, the other 4 kids looked pissed and freezing. More kids came in to use the pool and they said, "Oh no, Mom! The water is ON!! Noooooo!"

What? 'The water is on?' Shouldn't this be a cool thing for a kid??
Not here. This water means serious business. You stand in front of that water gun, you're going down. Like Rambo-style.

One mom asked the lifeguard in a rather pissed off tone, after her kids were crying for 5 minutes and refused to get into the water, 'Can we turn the water off?'
Lifeguard: 'Nope. We just turned it on because someone requested it. (Hello! Yes! That would be me!) Once we turn it on, it stays on until 11:30.'

SUPER!

I'm practically underneath the water at this point in shame. This pool was about 2 ft. deep, so you can imagine how hard that was to do. Emily and I were literally the only 2 people in the middle of the pool by now, getting absolutely drenched and loving it.

So - the one feature I've heard so much about is actually disliked by resident pool goers. And I'm the jackass mom who requested the water be turned on. I'm the one who made the poor babies cry and their mommies' shoot fake laser beams at me out of their eyeballs.

Even though Emily was having the time of her life, I felt a little bad. Hell, I was actually shocked she liked it so much. That water gun sprayed the living crap out of her face when it turned on. It practically knocked her over. I thought she'd for sure be freaked out by all the commotion.

Slowly but surely, a few older kids manned up and got in on the water action. I think they were threatened by Emily's lack of fear. :) But the babies and 2 year olds were screwed. Sorry, kids!

Lesson here is, folks....
Well, I'm not quite sure.
What I do know? I won't be the one requesting the water next time and neither should you. Let someone else take the heat!